Yes, Yes I Am

“Are you gay?” This is a question that I used to dread, especially when asked directly to me.  A simple question that requires a simple answer. But now, I feel the need to voice out my sentiments on the matter, not that I’m hiding anything. I consider this as a sensitive topic, for it encompasses my entire being, my entire existence.

One question, asked millions of times, summarized into seven different answers.

Q: Are you gay?

A: Yes, I’m gay, but I’m not a beautician, hairdresser, makeup artist, or parlorista for that matter. I have nothing against the profession, but I am a computer engineer, thank you very much. I write programs, solder electronic components to make circuits, I lift,  clean, troubleshoot, and maintain workstations, printers and other peripherals, and I eat malware for breakfast. What a “real man” can do, I've been doing it for ages. And don’t underestimate me just because I don’t look techie enough for you – I know better.

Q: Are you gay?

A: Yes, I’m gay, and I am not inferior to you. Most, if not, all the time, gays end up as pioneers on almost every field of expertise you can think of. I desire success not for myself, but for my family, so they can live a better life. Endless nights of overtime duty and mountains of tasks to be done are nothing compared to the joy in their faces.

Q: Are you gay?

A: Yes,  I’m gay, but it doesn't mean that I’ll devour the closest man in the vicinity, like what most people think of. It hurts me to look at their stupid disgusted faces when I get to seat right next to them in public transportation. That’s just plain insane! As a child, I've been a victim of sexual abuse, so I know that feeling – and I vow to myself that I will never let anyone experience that same thing.

Temptation? I think I’ll pass. I’m not to accept every “offer”, or “do it” with every man I meet. I, too, have standards. I am not, and will never be, a pervert. Why? Because I was not raised to act in such manner. Yes, I appreciate the beauty of men, and that’ts it. I believe in true love, not lust, and I am confident enough to say that. I believe in God, and I have faith in Him.

Q: Are you gay?

A: Yes, I’m gay, and it’s not a mental disorder nor something that needs to be corrected. Time and again, it has been proven that homosexuality is as normal as it can get. It exists not just on human beings, but on the majority of animals in this planet. Please, don’t force people like me to undergo therapy, or worse, join the military. You can’t do anything about it, and you’re not supposed to do anything about it, either. It’s not a matter of choice – it’s a matter of learning and embracing one’s identity, and gain respect from the rest of the world.

Q: Are you gay?

A: Yes, I’m gay, but I don’t live up to the name all the time. I have feelings too. Behind every smile and laughter is fear of rejection and discrimination brought by this cruel world. You think that it’s alright for me to be called “fag”, “drag”and everything else? Names, labels, stereotypes: call it whatever you want, but I’m over with it. I’m sick and tired of dealing with those little demons. I might just punch you in the face, should you try to call me names.

Yes, it’s hard to live such a challenging life, but It doesn't stop me from celebrating life at its best. Like Dr. Doofenshmirtz, I have loads of back stories that are worth a 2-part drama special on a prime time slot, but I choose to be happy. I choose to be gay.

Q: Are you gay?

A: Yes, I’m gay, but I am man enough to share my two cents – my side of the story – to everyone. The next time you meet someone like me, remember that there’s more to homosexuality than meets the eye.

Q: Are you gay?

A: As Phineas would say, “Yes, yes I am.”

Kiel In The Middle

"Life is not just black and white. It has hues and colors in between, which makes it GAY." This is what most people tend to ignore since the dawn of our era. As far as the human race is concerned, gays and lesbians are considered as "the cancer of the society," so to speak. True enough, we have received much love and affection for the past couple of decades, as compared to the harsh treatment our kind had endured for how many years, but still, there are people with a narrow way of thinking about life.

But what is homosexuality, really? It is clinical term first used over a century ago, often used inaccurately, to label people who are emotional, physically, and/or sexually attracted or committed to members of the same sex. Used appropriately, it refers to affection and or sexual behavior between people of the same sex.

There isn't a single dictionary that confined gays as incapable of doing men's jobs, or people who can only work in salons or spas. As a matter of fact, we have already played a significant role in our society, and I am confident to say that without us, it wouldn't be that easy to attain what we all have now. In almost every field of our society, we have been growing in numbers, thriving to live just as any normal would do.

"Life is not just black and white. It has hues and colors in between, which makes it GAY."

We give color to this world. This is, I believe, our greatest strength. No one can argue with that. Even in the worst of times, we are hardly seen lonely. We live a life full of happiness. Personally, I look at my problems in a positive point of view. I take them as challenges that will hone me to be the best that I can. This is our advantage against straight people. We laugh at our problems, but we deal with them seriously.

I have never regretted the day I came out of my shell. It is who I really am, and no one can ever change that. But still, I get this feeling of being an alien to others, as if homosexuality is a vast barrier that kept me from them.

I am in the middle; Kiel is in the middle. I am neither a man nor woman; I can have the strength and agility of a man and the humility and grace of a woman. I can enjoy both worlds without limitations- literally!

I want people to understand that sexual preference is just a thing that all of us have to live with. It does not define a person's capabilities and limitations. A person is who he wants to be, regardless of any social status. I am not asking for everyone to like us. At the very least, treat us as you would treat others.

"I can enjoy both worlds without limitations -- literally!"

It's nerve-wracking to be typecast as someone who isn't me. I live up my life to my expectations, not other people's. I can be a famous, well-respected and wealthy person, even with people telling me I can’t. I am Kielicious. Period.